I grew my gray hair out nearly 6 years ago. I was 34 years old.
My friends told me: Jen, do not do this until you are 40.
And I didn’t listen. I’m glad I didn’t.
We’re in the middle of a quarantine right now, and many of you can’t get to your salon, and are choosing to not buy boxed color. So the question is: it’s been at least 5 weeks since you’ve had a visit to the salon. Do you continue growing out your gray? Or do you rush back the first chance you get?
You’ve gotten a head start. That’s the good thing.
In my opinion, keep going.
Here’s my going gray story:
My hair turned gray in my early 20s. I used boxed color, then hair salon color, then organic hair salon color, for years and years. My hair grows fast, so I was coloring it every 5 weeks, and truly needed to touch up the roots in between visits. This was a huge expense, and more importantly to me, a time waster.
Finally, at 34, I got fed up, and much to the demise of many of my friends, I cancelled my upcoming hair appointment. About three months went by, and I started to get comments about my hair, mostly from people who were encouraging and supportive, and curious: are you really doing this? About a year went by, and most of the old color had grown out. That was when I got comments – all the time.
People stopped me in grocery stores, in airplanes, at airports, out shopping, at my yoga classes: I love your hair. Men and women, but I’ll say, mostly men, gave positive comments about me, and the way I looked.
I had never had that happen before, not that I can remember at least.
And let me mention: they never said, I love your gray. They said: I love your hair. I think there’s something to that.
Mind you: I got negative comments too, mostly from women older than me who colored their hair. Things like: I would never, ever do what you’re doing. And, I don’t want anyone to think I am older than my husband.
I get it.
I was called brave.
Guys, gray hair is not brave. Bold, maybe, but not brave.
It’s more common now that women are growing out their gray, so I don’t stand out as much, and that’s fine by me. I don’t think it needs much discussion, however I’m kinda simple: I don’t wear make-up, and I never have, not even on my wedding day. I’m not much into fashion or trends or anything that comes out in a magazine. So going gray might have been easier for me than maybe many of you.
Was it worth it, to go gray, to grow it out for over a year, at such a young age?
For me, it was. I got it over with. I don’t have to think about it anymore, or worry about it anymore. It’s done.
I do look older. I can see the shock on people’s faces when they find out I am still in my 30s.
That might be enough for you to hold off.
I was told a few weeks ago from a model that I could also model. She offered to hook me up with her talent agent in Dallas. And, the next words out of her mouth were: you know you can buy great hair color at the grocery store.
Hmmm.
So, maybe modeling isn’t in my future, and that’s fine by me. It was never something I ever even thought of. However, this simply shows the stigma in society around gray.
I think it’ll always be there.
It is just a damn color. I mean, come on people.
And I know that all those toxic chemicals are no longer getting into my bloodstream. Are no longer so close to my brain, the main organ I want to keep healthy.
Does hair color effect our bodies in that way? I have no idea. But really, those kind of chemicals – they can’t help.
So, if you’re on the fence, from one natural color gal to another, keep going. You can always color it back to whatever color you prefer.
I do have moments where I wish my hair was still brown. Many moments, in fact. But it’s not. And it hasn’t been in nearly two decades. The fake color never felt right to me. So for me, this was the best decision. It wasn’t easy. Growing hair out – man, that sucks. But for me, it was worth it.
It might be for you, too.
Love, Jen
PS – next week I’ll be posting my favorite shampoos and conditioners for those with gray hair. After 6 years, I have tried it all. Stay tuned!