A few weeks ago, I taught an outdoor yoga class for our new riverfront development’s Wine Down series. I had no idea what to expect, what type of class to prepare, or who would show up – so I decided I would just wing it. And 46 yogis showed up. It was their biggest event of the year, and it was so much fun to be a part of.
What happens in classes this size is you can’t spend as much time with each yogi as you’d like. But this class, there were two women who looked incredibly confused getting in and out of a few of the poses. So I went over to see if I could help, and confirmed my thinking that they’d never practiced yoga before. One of the two said she had bad knees and wasn’t flexible. I told her I’d do the best I could to help her understand the poses, and that yoga would most likely help with her flexibility over time.
And she said: “Good. I want to be flexible enough to have better sex.”
I laughed, and replied, “You will. I promise. Stick with it.”
We all get here for different reasons. To lose weight, to find stillness, to retreat from pain, and for some, to have a better sex life.
It’s not necessarily the conversation I thought I’d be having, but she came up to me afterwards, and we continued to discuss this subject matter. The woman was serious. She’s in it for the sex.
And really, why not? Personally, every aspect of my life improved after I became more serious about my yoga practice. Sex included. And when your sex life improves, your marriage improves. Your opinion of yourself improves. You’re happier, and more enjoyable to be around. It’s the ripple effect.
If we’re all being honest with each other, can we say, deep inside, we practice yoga for many different reasons? More than just to go inward? If we didn’t shape up and slim up and get flexible, or have the mental stillness to enjoy more meaningful, deeper conversations, or be able to easily get up out of our chair or up off the floor, and also, let’s not forget, to have that better sex life, would we stick with it?
I don’t know.
And really, it doesn’t matter.
Whatever external reason you have for getting into yoga, stay with that. If that is what takes you to get to your mat, go for it. And then you’ll see, it’s the internal portion of the practice that will begin to change your life. All the extra stuff, it’s awesome, don’t get me wrong. It’s a confidence boost like no other. But what will stick with you, on your good days, and on your days filled with dread or sorrow, or sickness, is the mental aspect – the stillness, the pause, the beauty.
Because we all know the external reasonings don’t last. You have to find that peace, that happiness, from within. Someday, I’ll be 90 (I hope), and that day, I’m pretty sure my sex life is going to be quite different than it is today. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve worked in enough retirement homes over the years to say confidently that your sex life does not end, and the frequency of it doesn’t slow down unless you choose for it to slow down. Thank god.
So, do it for the sex.
And then, pay attention. It’ll start to change more than just your flexibility, your stamina, your drive, your hunger.
Sex sells, but peace lasts.
My husband just had a birthday, and when I asked him what he wanted, he responded with ‘whiskey’. He’s not a fan of birthdays, and never has been, which is unfortunate for me, because I absolutely love birthdays. And I absolutely love to bake. So, I decided to make him a whiskey cake with whiskey cream sauce. I bought vegan ice cream to serve with it, and completely forgot I bought it – so I’ll say it’s delicious without the ice cream, and you’ll have plenty of icing left over to pour over top when serving, but you might want to have some ice cream as well for a topping or side.
With love, whiskey and sexy yoga,
Sex, Yoga and Whiskey Cake
For the Cake
- 3 tbsp. flax seeds, ground
- 1 and 1/2 c. coffee, freshly brewed
- 1/4 c. irish whiskey
- 1/2 c. butter
- 1/2 c. natural cane sugar
- 1/2 c. light brown sugar
- 1 and 3/4 c. flour (I used whole wheat)
- 1 tsp. baking soda
- 1/2 tsp. salt
- 1/2 tsp. cinnamon
- 1 c. pecans, chopped
- 3/4 c. chocolate chips
For the Icing
- 1 c. cashews, soaked for 1-2 hours
- 2 tbsp. natural cane sugar
- 1/2 tsp. vanilla
- 1 tbsp. irish whiskey
Prep the Icing
- Prep the cashews by soaking in water for 1-2 hours, or if you're short on time, boil water, then pour over the cashews, and wait at least 30 minutes.
For the Cake
- Heat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Make the flax eggs: combine the ground flax with 9 tbsp. of warm water, and set aside, stirring often, for at least 10 minutes.
- Slowly heat the coffee, whiskey, butter and sugars in a small sauce pan for a few minutes on medium low. Don't let it simmer, and remove from heat once the butters melt. Stir well, and then set aside for several minutes to cool.
- In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour, baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Slowly add the coffee mixture, stirring well. Then pour in the flax mixture, stirring well.
- Spray your bundt pan with oil (I use coconut oil spray). Then pour the pecans and then the chocolate chips into the bundt pan, spreading evenly. Next, pour the batter over the pecans and chocolate.
- Bake the cake for 40-45 minutes, until a toothpick in the center comes out clean.
Make the Icing
- Rinse and drain the soaked cashews, and place in a high-powered blender. Add the sugar, vanilla, and whiskey, and blend on high until combined.
- Poke holes in the bottom of the bundt cake, and pour about 1/4 of the icing over the bottom of the cake. Then, let the cake cool completely.
- Once cool, turn the pan over to remove the cake, and pour over more icing. For serving, pour some icing on a plate, and then top with the sliced cake, or serve with the remaining icing on the side.